High Anxiety: 2012 Porsche Panamera Turbo S – Autoweek

15 Apr 2015 | Author: | Comments Off on High Anxiety: 2012 Porsche Panamera Turbo S – Autoweek
Porsche Panamera

High Anxiety: 2012 Panamera Turbo S

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Shortly I found out I was slated to receive the Turbo S for a week, I had a dream. I that my friend Peter had an unmolested cache of the Cure’s Seconds on cassette and was selling for $9.18 apiece. Then, an arachnid Gregor Samsa, he into a giant spider.

receiving the text describing my phantasm, he responded, #8220;Panamera your dream. Dr. Freud #8216;$9.18 + #8220;spider#8221; (spyder) + seconds = your anxiety Porsche present/future vs. past. invoice you.#8221;

And yes, make me anxious. Anxious the most mentally unstable of my have made me anxious. I them. I love them so much. I hate that I them so very much, and I am waiting for the day that one disappoints me in a fundamental sort of way.

I hold them to a higher, sort of standard, as Porsche is one of the few companies that has never forgotten how to build a car.

remind you, of course, a truck is not a car. The Cayenne is a The upcoming Macan sounds an exotic duck.

Nevertheless, the sedan made me nervous. Porsches are not quite Hethel-esque they are not Rolls-Royces. And lo, while the of Panameras is no looming Phantom. its curb weight might cause one to call it the car that puts the #8220;pork#8221; in #8220;Porker.#8221;

put, all of the luxury was worrisome expected at the eye-watering $185,000 point of this test Other than both having two turbochargers grafted an engine with more six cylinders, the hypersaloon is worlds from Mark Donohue’s Turbopanzer of the 1970s. That both are big, ungainly by the standards of their respective both indubitably go like

In fact, I will go so far as to posit the Panamera Turbo S is actually the sedan I have ever at any price.

Did I run with a Modena on a freeway on-ramp? Yes. Did a Panamera S merge onto State Route 152 ahead of me? Did I behind said identical-appearing car the time came to demonstrate the effect that 150 additional two additional driven wheels and the addition of lowercase #8220;turbo#8221; can have on a man’s ego? How I not?

Did I take it to a Sacramento club with aspiring Snookis and crashing the party along a gaggle of roller-derby queens? Of

That horrible nightspot was a hipster roadhouse where I the Bad Brains. This may or may not be relevant to the depending on which side of the argument you come down on.

on, my girlfriend and I cut out in favor of dive-bar warming up our voices by cranking the Burmester sound system and along to the Dead Kennedys’ Ьber Alles .#8221; we were not driving past Jerry Brown’s loft at the

Porsche Panamera

The bracing menace of Jello punk-rock chestnut was instructive. My punk instantly groks the realness of the Turbo S. It is not a car that or pretends. It’s awkward, and more agile than its size or mass has a right to be. It beautifully through the wheel. It is that the Serious Men of Weissach this car as heavily as they anything.

It’s Precision Auto exceptionally large. I even that it’s kind of Paint it in Porsche’s Macadamia brown, delete the fussy Turbo S#8221; badging, add a rack and tell me that it is not the behemoth.

See? You can’t.

Yet it is for people who know nothing of and might not even care it is an exceptionally wonderful automobile. Oh, somebody like Roger might have one, but the of people who purchase the Turbo S do so because of the price point, not in of it. My rational side says, they’re wealthy and can do as they with their money.#8221; My strident class warrior rails, #8220;Nobody who helped run country into the ground access to anything engineered well. Let the plutocracy drive Coupes .#8221;

I mulled that conflict as I hurried the Panamera practically all the way California, from the shores of Bay to the placid edge of Donner I pootled around in traffic. I got cool kids bobbing heads to Kraftwerk’s #8220;Trans-Europe #8221; at stoplights. I whanged the through corners in the Sierra foothills.

It excelled at everything I at it.

I started considering depreciation and how I probably pick up a used S in a few years if I tightened my belt so. I tried not to think about it would cost if I happened to the seven-speed PDK gearbox. I thought it anyway.

It snapped me awake. For the foreseeable my hoopty little 914 is going to to suffice.

Perhaps that’s the not just that I’m a for Porsches, I’m a sucker for redheaded stepchildren. Despite the haters would have you a 914 is a Porsche.

And so is the Panamera Turbo S. really, that’s all that to be said.

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